“the secret of change is to focus all your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.” – socrates
driving home from the airport late last night, i could tell brian had had a great trip. there was a lightness about him. it was wonderful being with chih, to celebrate this important event in his life. just as healing was the time he got to spend with his closest friend from business school, his family, and chin’s girlfriend.
being around friends from his past isn’t easy. it’s easy for brian to be reminded of his mistakes, and to experience self-judgement and shame. years ago, his best buddy, zondo, stepped up during a time when we needed him most, when our family was struggling for roots and courage to make it through some difficult times. the zondos became our second family in a big way. chih calls them ‘our east cost family’, and indeed they are.
while driving home brian shared with me (not something he used to be able to so readily) -how he got to spend some solo time with his buddy. how they got to share from the heart. they got to reconnect, not just in laughter, but in tears, through that tender place that reminds us we are human.
i do believe, brian’s heart is healing.
you sense family when they reach out to understand, love and accept you, just the way you are, mistakes and all. and man that feels good, so healing, especially when you didn’t have that growing up.