we’re all connected.
yesterday was a day filled with open heart emotions. i spent the day with my parents, listening to my dad play his harmonica with so much emotion – i think it’s his way of crying, watching my mom try her very best to take tiny steps down the hall… just for practice, and then interviewing loving, caring people for a position we are needing to fill…listening to their stories, and the love they have for the elderly brings me to tears.
when i arrived home, i found my man under his covers, telling me how he wasn’t feeling well, and probably wouldn’t be able to make it to our dear friend’s gig – she’s the female vocalist in an 11 member steely dan tribute band. my heart sank. i was really looking forward to being there for her, listening to her beautiful voice, and seeing her bright smile.
but i also know about my man’s demons. they are wicked huge. i understand depression.
i didn’t try and change him. i just listened and hugged him. and i didn’t go into victim mode. “woe is me, if only i had a man who liked to do things with me.” i just listened to his pain and held him. and went to plan B – i can always go by myself. i’m very familiar with plan B and it’s one that i’m very comfortable with…heck i used it the other night when i went to listen to my sweet darlingside band just the other night. but i also have a plan C. i could snuggle with my man and listen to him breathe. finish reading the book that i’m currently in love with – wonder. if you haven’t read it, it’s a must! – i’d been away all day, and i was going to be with my parents again today. so just relaxing with my man doing his favorite thing – being with me, alone in the house, in bed…was a definite possibility. but man, i wanted to hear my friend sing her sweet heart out.
i went into the kitchen to make some dinner, and before i knew it, i could hear him in the bathroom.
“come on let’s go” those were the exact words… and wow! he fought those demons, and rallied!
it was an amazing evening i must say. i sat there thinking ‘wow, some of these band members are really old…’ and then i realized that they were probably our age, and that all these young people were probably thinking the same about us! my friend was on fire all evening! she sang and sang, smiled and danced…and was just so beautiful!
but perhaps the greatest part of the evening was connecting with people we rarely see. we sat at a table with friends we don’t know super well, but ones who willingly opened from the heart, and who we honestly feel closer to now. we weren’t with people who brian fears – the ones who only talk about their perfect lives. we were surrounded with friends who were willing to share from the broken heart. one who recently lost his mom and dad and who was having to sell the house he grew up in; a single mom who recently lost her only son to a rare form of lung cancer (he was 27 years old…); and another sweet friend whose husband is still recovering from brain damage after a serious bike accident.
here we were with our angel singer on stage shining her light, while we sat there all connected through her love. she was the one person we all had in common…and i realized that these are the friends brian needs. the friends who can be open and vulnerable. the friends who aren’t afraid to share their true lives.
when friends can sing from the heart, the good and the bad…i feel the connection.
we all have our losses, our pains, our tears, but we have our joys, our laughs too.. and it feels so good to share.
it’s through the broken heart that we often find our truest, dearest, most connected friends. and sometimes it’s an angel who brings us there.