what is family? we often think of it as a unit consisting of blood related individuals.
i see family as a feeling.
when i’m with people who understand me, support me, and accept me as i am, i feel family.
family is also associated with the familiar. family is what we grew up knowing. but sometimes that ‘family’ isn’t so healthy. what feels familiar, may not be so good for me. the feeling of not being good enough, or not fulfilling parental expectations, or that feeling of guilt or of letting someone down…maybe those familiar feelings are what i associate with family, but those are feelings i don’t want to continue living with.
i make the conscious decision to change. i change what is ‘familiar family’, and create my new family. i create this new feeling of family, by choosing people who accept me as i am, and by choosing different ways of reacting to my ‘familiar family’. when my father chooses to express his anger in a loud voice, or to criticize me, i can give him the space to have those feelings, but i don’t have to take those words personally – i can choose not to be a victim….i can choose to love myself, and to love my familiar family, and to surround myself with the feeling of family i help create.
in making conscious decisions to choose how i see the world, i find the feeling of family.